Mommy, How Are Babies Made?
by perje
Summary: Courtney's mouse had just clicked the word document containing the case when- "Mommy... How are babies made?" One night Courtney and Duncan try to explain to their daughter the miracle of life- Hilarity ensues. Duncan x Courtney, one-shot.


**HI guys! So I've been wanted to do this one-shot for a long time, but never actually got around to it... So um.. yeah! Please enjoy this fan-fiction :) **

Courtney finally sank into her deep cushy armchair and breathed a sigh of relief as she lifted her laptop to her lap. Today had been Juliet's 6th birthday. Despite her daughters wish to have a 'quiet and serene party with a few close friends' quite and serene had exploded into loud and rowdy, and a few close friends into 35 classmates, loaded with sugar and ready to destroy any vase in their paths. Courtney had relied on a steady supply of aspirin and Duncan to not strangle 'darling' little Banjo, Amie and Paris for destroying at least 5 family heirlooms.

It was 3 hours after the party had ended, 1 and a half hours after Courtney had finally scraped the last bits of pink cake from the wall and about 10 minutes after Juliet had gone to bed. Courtney was ready to get into a new case she had just been assigned. Her mouse had just clicked the word document containing the case when.

"Mommy... How are babies made?"

Courtney froze and turned to face her young daughter. She had the same carmel colored hair and tanned skin tone as her mother, but her teal eyes- slightly misty with sleep- were from her dad. She was wearing a white nightgown, dotted with pink alligators (Juliet happened to be in love with alligators at the present) and was looking at her intently from the doorway.

"Um..." Courtney's eyes flickered from side to side.

_How did she explain this one? Sure all the books had technically prepared her for this moment, but her daughter was six. SIX. This moment was supposed to come at about 7 years of age according to 'Mother Knows Best!' . She had one more year!_

" Come over here honey," Courtney said, motioning for her daughter to come to her side, "Why do you want to know?"

"Well... Y'know how Tommy's mommy is going to have a baby soon, and I was just wondering how it happened..." Juliet shyly explained, playing with a strand of her mocha colored hair, and looking up her at mother from under her bangs.

Courtney opened her mouth to give a shaky answer but before any of this could happen, Duncan swaggered into the room. His mohawk (that had survived many attempt on Courtney's side to shave it) was in complete disarray and he was wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a large green shirt.

"Quite a day, eh? Lemme tell you, when I get my hands on that kid with the weird name- Banjo?- yeah, Banjo. Who the Hell calls their kid Banjo anyways-" Duncan slouched down in a chair across from Courtney's then noticed his daughter standing beside her, ideally tracing the woodwork on the sides of the chairs.

"Hey Princess!" Duncan said, opening his arms to the little girl, who gleefully ran into them, and snuggled into her dad's chest, "what's been keeping you up?"

"I was just asking Mommy how babies were made!" Juliet responded happily.

"Well..." Duncan cleared his throat,"When Mommy and Daddy really love eachother-"

"DUNCAN!" Courtney cried, jerking her head up from her laptop.

"Listen! She's going to learn eventually!"

"She's only six! What the heck are you thinking?" Courtney exclaimed, her eyes wide.

"My older brother told me exactly what happened when I was 6!" Duncan retorted, "Plus she's going to go to sex-ed eventually!"

"What's that Daddy?"

"DUNCAN! I TOLD YOU NOT TO!"

"Fine! You explain how babies are born than!" Duncan said, throwing up his arms. Juliet who was looking nervous at all this yelling hopped down from Duncan's chair and and ran back over to her mother. Looked at her with the biggest puppy eyes she could make and jutted out her bottom lip.

"Mommy... please, please, please, please_, please_ tell me! I really wanna know!"

"A stork darling. A stork. Is that a good enough answer?"

"Where do the storks get the babies from?" Juliet asked, obviously not satisfied with her current answer to the question.

Duncan smirked at Courtney as she shifted uncomfortably in her chair, and gave her a 'look-what-you've-brought-on-yourself' look. Suddenly Courtney smiled as an idea came to her.

"Well, you see honey. When Mommy really loves Daddy they give eachother a kiss, and then the kiss summons an stork and it will ask Mommy and Daddy if they want a baby, and then if they say yes the stork gives Mommy a packet of baby seed, and she can eat them up- like sunflower seeds- and then inside her tummy grows a baby. The baby falls from the tree!The end!" Courtney grinned proudly at her story. Duncan had a mixture of a disgust and amusement on his face. However to Courtney's delight Juliet looked completely satisfied at the outwardly story of talking storks and stomach trees.

Duncan broke into hysterical fits of laughter.

"A tree... A tree... A tree... In the stomach!" Duncan managed to get out in between laughs.

"Better than were you were going Duncan!" Courtney said, crossing her arms, her face set in a scowl, "Please, that story is way more accurate than you give me credit for!"

**So yeah, I know the ending is weak, but I just didn't know what else to put. That is how I thought babies were created when I was little, although, I didn't really realize how accurate my guess was (it was just a guess) until I was about 10 and I had my first health class. So, um, please review! **

**~ Ritzy **


End file.
